Turns out if you want to perform my story in forensics or speech competitions, it needs to be published... so here you go! |
WAR GAMES performed at Music Hall of Williamsburg, Brooklyn, NY: October 8, 2012. Theme: Fish Out of Water
SPECIAL NOTE: This story was transcribed in the "interview theater" style, as Anna Deavere Smith transcribes her interviews for performance. So instead of using punctuation, I use a new line to denote that there's a little pause-- sometimes REALLY little. I've also noted audience reaction and movements where relevant. A week into the school year teaching third grade I already know that I am in over my head it’s my first year at a new school it’s a progressive private school but I’m an experienced third grade teacher I know third graders they’re cuddly they love stuffed animals and so do I and this class is different the girls are great they’re actually running a stuffed animal hospital so I can do that but the boys have a war game and it’s not the kind of war game I’m used-- little boys always play war that’s clear they don’t have just a war game they have an army it has a hierarchy it has a real enemy the enemy is the homeschool kids who share the park with us at recess (LAUGH) and when they’re not in battle which we’re desperately trying to stop at recess they’re preparing for battle they’re training in school seriously it takes over our year. when we line up for lunch-- when you line up for lunch and you’re in third grade and I’m a third grade teacher I say we don’t push we don’t talk I have to say we don’t shoot each other point blank in the forehead. because that leads with these guys to strangulations and punching and I have to separate them and at free time they tie each other to chairs with construction paper and practice interrogation techniques which leads to strangling and punching and separation they draw battle strategies and they use up all my red markers because the sprays of blood are so overwhelming (LAUGH) now that’s one thing free time is one thing but then it gets to class time and I say this is what we’re gonna do and the girls go ahead and do it and the boys say no they’re busy doing tactics ground tactics and they don’t say no rebelliously they say it like patronizing like why would we do third grade when there’s a war on? (LAUGH) I’m lost in all of this I am a teddy bear kind of teacher and I’m not a drill sergeant I don’t know how to stop them from constantly punching each other and the school’s lost too it’s a lovely school we believe in cooperative discipline we think that kids should do what they’re interested in except in this case what they’re interested in is taking the homeschoolers hostage. (LAUGH) the parents try to help they have their kids play their game uh on the weekends so that it doesn’t disrupt class but it backfires they show up on monday in fatigues and the whole thing starts all over again. now this is not a draft this is conscription uh you know it’s not it’s not um involuntary and they don’t let everyone into the army there are a couple of boys who aren’t in the army one of the boys is Robert Robert is younger than everyone else um and he uh has a baby face and the other kids the other guys talk about choke points and recon and he wants to talk about the most useful aspect of the new apple operating system (LAUGH) which I also kind of wanna talk about it’s the space bar where you -- (LAUGH) so so but he wants to be in the army it’s the only game in town it’s really most of the guys are doing this one day I overhear this conversation where Robert says to Greg who’s one of the generals “can I be in the army today at recess” and Greg says “sure you can be a suicide bomber” (GASP) Robert says “why” and Greg says “cause everyone wants you to die.” (GASP) I go straight over to Greg and I say “you do not talk like that” and he looks at me and it’s like he’s looking through me and he turns around and ignores me I feel like I’m not spending my time with 9 year olds I’m with mercenaries and it’s getting to me I mean when you spend 8 hours a day 5 days a week in something you feel like it’s your reality I’m crying after school I start my countdown calendar for the end of the year in March I just want to be with kids I understand again finally it’s April it’s recess I’m on patrol (LAUGH) We have to patrol because even if the home schoolers aren’t there they find uh hidden pockets in the park where the teachers can’t see and just wail on each other so we have to patrol the perimeter so I’m doing that and I get to the sand pit which is this deep pit you can’t really see inside unless you’re standing right there and there’s Robert my apple kid kneeling in the sand execution style holding his own hands behind his back with his face in the sand and three guys high level military personnel are starting to bury him head first in the sand. and I snap. I go hot and cold and I jump in the sand pit and I haul out Robert he’s got sand in his hair he looks kind of dazed I mean, he thinks he’s playing and I tell the three guys “Go.” and I line them up against a fence out of sight of the other teachers (LAUGH) and I got a rage in me that I have not had before I haven’t seen anything like this from 9 year olds before and I say “when you misbehave as third graders I act like a third grade teacher I call your parents I give you time out but when you do something like what you were about to do you’re being cruel as people and I don’t feel like a teacher” (LAUGH) I don’t know where this is coming from but I keep going and I say “and I don’t know what I do when I’m this mad as a teacher not- and I don’t feel like a teacher.” and they look at me and I can see they’re really listening for the first time and I start to get a little into character and I say “if I ever see that again I don’t know what I’ll do I just don’t know.” (LAUGH) There’s real fear now I don’t feel like a teacher I feel like a general and then I say “and by the way, we never had this conversation.” (LAUGH) now I am a general who has gone rogue and they’re looking at me like that not like a teacher and so for the first time I can look at them and they don’t look like mercenaries they look like little boys I’m playing their game better than they do and I know that from now on this game is gonna change my game is gonna change you can’t be a teddy bear teacher when there is a war on (LAUGH) and so I can stand back and be myself and I stand back and I say the thing that third grade teachers for time immemorial have said to kids to let them know after they get in trouble that it’s okay that we still love them and I stand back and I’m myself again except different (LAUGH) and dangerous and I say “go play.” Thank you. |